How To Get Your Man Back:
What Causes A Man To Leave, and
How You Can Get Him Back

Women Who Are Attuned To Their Man

When a woman is in love with a man, she can feel fully "in tune" with him - and love that feeling of knowing him deeply. According to Bob Grant, author of The Woman Men Adore and two other books, she has a strong urge to act on these feelings by making her man's life better.

Excerpted from "How To Get Him Back:"

"All her intuition is focused on 'What can I do to be helpful to him?'

"She is also more likely to become attuned to his wishes and his moods. She might anticipate what he wants. It is an empathetic skill that few men master - or, to be honest, really even want to.

"It might seem that men would appreciate this characteristic and never want to leave them. After all, what could be better than having a woman in your life who is trying to please you?

"For a man, the problem arises when a woman overuses this gift."

Women too often feel that the sheer power of the feelings they have plus the fact that they know their man so well should mean that he will respond lovingly and gratefully to such a giving woman.

Then they feel frustrated when this does not happen - and perhaps outraged when his next girlfriend or wife seems to not care one bit about his needs, yet he seems to be madly in love with her.

What's wrong with this picture? Should you deny those glorious feelings of wanting to show your love, of wanting to give? No - that would be denying yourself. The key is to know when and how much to give - and how to give so that men can receive your giving.

An email I received yesterday said in part:

 

Dear Mimi, I was that woman.  I tried to please my guy too fast and too soon, and I did everything under the sun for him, even loan him money to pay for bills and help him...

To that reader, take heart and forget that man. Your giving nature can be an asset in the right situation and at the right time. Thanks for sharing this.

From another reader:

 

Dear Mimi I am one of your new readers and I do like the way you put your words. This one is me: too much giving. It's not that I do it for him to love me more or to keep him, it's always been me since I was a little girl. I love to share and give to anyone for a reason and no reason.

Thanks for that email. Giving is important to most women. We women need to take time to examine how we give, when, and how things work out for us. One of the most important ways to make giving work is to choose your recipient wisely, whether we're talking about men or any other situation.

Thanks to Bob Grant for sharing with us part of his new book "How to Get Your Man Back" - you can read about it here:

http://GetYourManBack.com

How Do You Know When You Are Giving Too Much In Your Relationship?

by Mimi Tanner, Author of Calling Men - The Complete Guide to Calling, Emailing and Text Messaging the Men You Date

As most women know, when you give too much (and too soon), it can backfire, even though you mean it in the best way.

Men in particular can often be turned off by a woman who gives too much. It can be the beginning of the end of what began as a passionate and exciting new love.

However, author Bob Grant explains WHY overgiving turns a man off (yes, even if you are married). I was completely surprised by the answer. It is a part of his new book (previewed at the following link)

http://GetYourManBack.com

This advice will help the next time you are tempted to give too much - because when you remember the REASON it turns men off, that will definitely make you hold back on the over-giving. Bob Grant explains that overgiving can actually cause a man to see you as too controlling!

Is that a shocker? Well, it's true!

Many women are overgiving out of fear of loss. Fear does not lead to smart actions.

Even though you don't expect anything in return, he will feel that you do - because the scales will not be in balance. It's not about keeping score, but it is about respecting a man's feeling of obligation when a woman gets heavy with the giving - doing favors for him, running errands for him, buying him big gifts, and so on.

Focus on having fun. Don't start cooking up ways to give to him. Let Being With You be the greatest gift you have to share. You do not need to do things for a man or give him things to prove your worth or to create feelings of love in him for you - and deep down this can be a motivation even if we don't see it.

Always remember - men really enjoy giving to you! They feel far more love for you when they are the givers than when you are the giver.

NOT sold in bookstores! Only available online.